Standing

Art by Paula Rosa

Well, well, well, it seems I will have to get used to my memories because that special place is about to become my working place. It's not that bad, I mean, as long as it makes me laugh (though I look like a psycho) I don't really care. Besides, it seems I won't have to be there every single day, so I think I can stand it. Even more, I was really interested in working right there, let's say it's a convenient distance, a seemingly safe place, it's pretty, and, of course, that's the job I wanted to get. Yes, at this moment there's nothing more important than translation, that's what I want to do.

I received great comments on my translation test. I didn't expect that. The thing is that it was such a weird text and I was so nervous that I thought I had made a real mess out of  it. I spent all these days trying to remember the most difficult parts and I was sure of having translated them correctly, but...Mmm... If you know me well, then you know about my maniac self-critic behaviour, and yesssss, my even more maniac lack of self-confidence. Ahhh, but I have to say right now there's a good reason for that unseasiness. Two weeks ago I had a horrible experience that let me depressed and with the feeling that I was not good. No matter how hard people tried to convince me it was not my fault, I felt really bad. In fact, I knew it was not my fault, I knew I was much better than many of the others who may have applied for the job, and I knew the bad one there was not me, but these people who don't know their business and put me in complete disadvantage. However, I felt bad just the same. It was as if after having studied so hard, for so many years and despite all my effort, they came and told me, "sorry, you know nothing at all, ahh how comes you think you are a translator?" I felt like a fool and crumbled down. Anyway, I promised I would not stop and here I am doing things by myself.

I thought 2010 was an awful year meant only to be forgotten, but now I see... It's been all of a process of learning in many senses. True, the process is continuous and when it comes to someone like me, so eager for knowledge, it becomes overwhelming; however, 2010 is particularly significant because I've found ways to stand on my feet first if I want to fly. Ahhhh, but 2010 is not over yet, so let's wait and see what happens. I want surprises, good surprises!!